Guest Columnist
Chidinma: Nemesis of Sugar Daddies, Parental Failure, By Michael West
Chidinma didn’t just start today, she graduated to this hybrid crime from sneaking out to overnight runs. Parents should buckle up and firmly take charge of their children.
This generation of youths are in danger of self-immolation. This is due to their flagrant indulgence in immoral lifestyle such as drug abuse, prostitution, cultism, financial crimes, armed robbery and Yahoo plus which is euphemism for money rituals. Many of them have become wayward, obfuscate, nonchalant, irreverent, daredevil, unpredictable, heartless, drug and sex addicts, killers, grossly pretentious and sacrilegiously rebellious.
The last one week has been a shocking one in the country over the gruesome killing of a man, Usifo Ataga, said to be a billionaire and proprietor of Super TV. The incident has since dominated the media space and street talks. Several conspiracy theories have been propounded as possible causes of his death. The suspect, 21-year-old Chidinma Ojukwu, has made confessional statement in which she admitted to have solely committed the homicidal act under hypnotic influence of drugs. She explained to the police and the media how it all happened. Some CCTV clips have surfaced online showing when they sat together before heading for the room. Likewise, previous video clips of Chidinma were released by her friends and admirers including her course mates at the University of Lagos.
Watching her appearances in motion pictures, Chidinma appeared to me a jolly girl. She has her own mind. She’s pretty, intelligent but wayward and sly with concealed criminal tendencies. I see her as an epitome of untamed exuberant youth, misdirected talent and ill-trained daughter of liberal parents. Analysing her conducts and utterances, I see a girl that enjoyed so much latitude of freedom with minimal or no restraint at all. She might have had a good and tender upbringing but mixing and associating with street guys had swayed her off the right course of life. How and when she outgrown parental control is left to her parents to explain.
I want to dissect Chidinma’s matter from four prongs of behavioural analyses:
- Being a nemesis for randy men, aristos and sugar daddies.
- As a consequence of weak parenting
- As a fallout of acrimonious marriage or broken home
- How not to abuse freedom by applying caution, discipline and self-restraint from becoming a disaster like Chidinma has turned out to be.
From time immemorial, there are older men who are pedophile in nature. I tag them pedophile because they’re sexually attracted to underage girls. It is shocking to discover that many women today had been sexually molested when they were below age 10. Some old men married teenage girls in a polygamous setting. Religious tenets are the excuses some men cling to in justifying the crime. Until Nigerians kicked against hefty and heavily bearded former Sharia governor of Zamfara State, Ahmed Sani Yerima, who gleefully announced his intention to marry a 13-year-old “smallie,” he would have gone ahead with his uncomely intention. It is an acceptable practice in some part of this country to “catch them young” in bed while their own daughters are sent overseas for academic pursuits and they get married as full grown adults.
Socially, rich older men also delight themselves in messing around with tiny, adventurous and inordinately ambitious young girls. These set of girls cut across the strata of the society. Daughters of the rich, influential, religious leaders as well as those of the poor. Social circle is a form of leveller where they freely mix, fraternise and mutually share, care and support one another. They indulge in smoking and drinking to feel ‘high’ so they can ‘perform’ or ‘deliver’ at maximum ‘capacity.’ Many of such girls are students at higher institutions of learning. Only a few of them engage in the “biz girls’ runs” in order to fund their studies and to assist their indigent parents. Such girls are often selective of the type of events they attend. This game is so dangerous as several of them have been sacrificed for money rituals by their ‘generous’ aristos and Yahoo plus boyfriends. Some of the sugar daddies also use the girls for other purposes beyond erotic satisfaction. They do use the girls as moles, traps for their business partners or competitors, and as spies on their other targets. However, the age disparity of 40 years and above, is rather a point of attraction to the young energetic girls who promised the daddies to offer more than “our mothers.” It is also on record, a few cases of older men who failed to survive the “journey” with their ‘sugar babies’ as they experienced palpitations and later slumped to death in action. For older men, I hope they should start returning home before their own nemesis catch up with them.
More often than not, parental failure is the root of Chidinma’s problem. Let me state here that there are exceptional cases where parents would give their best in training, discipline and godly upbringing but the children would, out of their own volition, go wayward and become rascally. Peer pressure and influence are the factors for such cases. In that case, the parents should expose the children for further help, discipline and for prayers and counseling. Meanwhile, many of today’s parents are too laid-back in mentoring and monitoring their children. Parents are too soft these days with their children that have shown tendencies for waywardness. Child right to quality education, hygienic living, medical facilities, quality feeding and discipline are basic to raising future leaders. But when parents are cutting corners for their children to gain admission and they engage mercenaries to write external exams for them, what do you expect such children to become later? They put on all manner of seductive, perforated and see-through wears right under the noses of their parents without a word of caution. They associate with rough looking guys not because they are poor but for the fashion style they choose to wear, yet, parents, especially mothers would only tell them, “you guys should please tread softly. Take a good care of yourselves.” Imagine an undergraduate is using an iPhone that costs over N400,000 without asking questions. Some parents will look elsewhere pretending not to be aware of it. Secretly she’s happy that her daughter is trendy. Chidinma didn’t just start today, she graduated to this hybrid crime from sneaking out to overnight runs. Parents should buckle up and firmly take charge of their children until they become fully independent and accountable to themselves. Parental neglect, weak supervision, indulgence and over pampering are some of the undoing that account for criminal tendencies in our youths today.
Usifo Ataga represented the reality of many married men. Until his death, not many people are aware of his marital status. It was assumed that he was “happily married” to an upwardly mobile manager at the Nigeria National Petroleum Corporation, NNPC. Separated four years ago, with so much money available to him, marrying another wife would have preserved his life. Apparently avoiding the pitfalls of the law in engaging in another marriage while the present one is subsisting is why some men become easy preys to younger Jezebels prowling the town in their innocent, arresting and captivating look. Troubled marriages push men into avoidable deaths sometimes; even those in “happy marriages” also sneak out to indulge. The likes of Chidinma are a nemesis to unfaithful and indulgent husbands. If you need a woman, please marry and if you are separated, stay with one trusted and dependable partner until you sort out the legal hurdles.
Lastly, girls raised by liberal parents in relaxed environments should not stretch their luck too far. They should know when and where to draw the lines. Sometimes, too much latitude could be suicidal just like the case of Chidinma the daughter of Ojukwu.