Men, too, are scared of women! A lot of women are pretenders when they are still outside. They will do anything to impress men just to secure a place for themselves in marriage.
I had started working on the topic I wanted to treat this week when I received a call from a reader of this column. He had earlier sent a mail to me last month but our discussion on Tuesday made me decided to publish the mail today. I was reluctant to publish the letter because it was worded in a rather adulating style which I’m not comfortable with. After the discussion, I decided to use the edited version to “fulfill the purpose of the letter” as he said. Please read on:
I decided to write this testimony in order to encourage people out there on the need to seek help through counselling at every challenging situation of their lives. I can now appreciate the Bible that says in the multitude of counsel, there’s safety. My life is a practical example.
Early last year, I relocated to Lagos from Kogi State barely a year after I lost my wife. Leaving two beautiful children for me to cater for, I decided to consider having another wife to ease my burden. This idea was laden with palpable fear of maltreatments by callous stepmothers going by what we hear and read in the media almost every day. To avoid falling into this trap, I decided to subscribe to your Hook Up service on the advice of a colleague who often share your column on our company’s WhatsApp group platform.
Initially I was skeptical to take to the advice but I eventually did because I truly needed a help. After speaking with you, sir, I knew the solution was in sight because you actually understood my situation and assured me that all will be well. One strategic approach you asked me to adopt helped me to filter the right partner among a whole lot I met. I can’t fathom the infallibility of that strategy. I have read several books on marriage and relationship but none suggested or even mentioned anything like that. It was strange to me.
With the consent of my wife, I want to acknowledge your contribution to our coming together and for seeing us through thus far. It may interest you to know that I shared the strategy with a friend who had a similar problem of choosing a life partner, he applied it and it is working out for him steadily. Like you do say, sir, “it is not every family man that is married.” I want to say that there are good and serious men out there looking for well-mannered and dependable women to marry.
Also, it is not true that most men are playboys or heart-breakers. When I needed a wife, some women ignored me thinking I wasn’t serious until they heard and saw that I actually remarried. Men, too, are scared of women! A lot of women are pretenders when they are still outside. They will do anything to impress men just to secure a place for themselves in marriage. I know a neighbour who fell for such ‘over’ caring and loving woman who pampered his daughter like an angel only to become a bitch that subdued and maltreated the same girl after she became his wife. Whereas the man married her thinking her daughter will be safe with her as stepmother.
I want to appeal to ‘single and searching’ women to eschew pretense and double-standard. When Michael West asked me to keep wearing my wedding ring while searching for a life partner, I almost ignored him. Indeed, I missed some beautiful women that ordinarily I would have settled for one of them as my wife but because they thought I was married, so, they won’t have anything to do with a married man. However, I thank God thank that I obeyed a wise counsel and I’m better for it. Thanks so much for touching lives. May God bless you in return. Amen. _*- Engr. Anonymous, Lagos.*_
There’s a common problem with people in need of companions or life partners; and that is how to choose right. I believe there’s nothing impossible for anyone who commits his/her ways to God for direction and counsel. It is easier to detect a lying man than a deceptive woman. While a lying man would maintain unstable behaviours replete with excuses, a crafty and deceptive woman would do anything to impress you such that you won’t think it is even necessary to check properly before consummating the relationship.
When the man called me in February last year, he narrated his story as a widower and his decision to get married again by the time it is two years after the demise of his wife. To get a woman is very easy but to get a good wife is very difficult. He found himself in the environment where single moms and single women were many especially in his place of work as well as in his social circles.
Immediately he told me that he had removed his wedding ring to reflect his true status as a single dad, I told him to start wearing it again. I told him that we needed his wedding ring as a catalyst to filter the real wife from this array of women. Like he noted in his letter, he was initially reluctant but later he did exactly as instructed.
In the process, he encountered some nice, beautiful and caring women. He insisted on a couple of them but I objected. I gave him further instructions through which he identified his new wife without much ado. He was so happy that he got it right not because of the woman’s beauty or background but for her sincerity, naturalness and simplicity. “Sir, she means more than the whole world to me,” he said.
What is this trick? You might ask to know, it’s something that is meant for men only! It has never failed. It is simply a way to sieve the real behaviour from the eye service or pretense. No matter how smart a woman is, this method will unveil her true nature. Meanwhile, the strategy works more for single dads, a class of men some single women won’t even give attention to. Your own happiness and testimony will come shortly. Cheers!
Send your responses/private issues to: *Email: mikeawe@yahoo.co.uk*
*+234-(0)8035304268 – SMS*
*+234-(0)8059964446 – Hook Up*
*Note:* You may actually be helping someone get through her issues or heal a broken heart by sharing this article on other platforms. Thanks.
